Gymslipnosis

A poem from 2017, based on a true story

Your eyes are getting heavy

You couldn't open them if you tried

You are getting sleepier

You no longer want to wake up

You want to wash away the pain in oblivion

You are going down, deeper

Past the years

Past the tears

Back to happier times

Those few precious, childhood days

In Dublin's fair city

Remember the dreams

Remember the innocent days

Remember school friends

Enjoy the moments of peace

Treasure the memories

Mary, Mary

Alcoholic mother

Abusing stepfather

The visits in the night

The fear, the fists

The expectation of being murdered

Mary, Mary

Ran away at 14

Took a ship to London

Hoping for a better life

Streets paved with the future

The expectation of newness of life

Mary, Mary

Sleeping rough

Noone to talk to

Reality comes and hits you in the face

A tall, dark stranger

Comes with comfort

Offers food and lodgings

A job with prospects

The expectation of love

Mary, Mary

Pimped by your comforter

Nine men on your first night

Shame, brokenness, a trap

Forced to take it to the streets

Red light, it only gets worse

No more expectations

Mary, Mary

The child moves inside you

You've seen what happens next

Knitting needle abortion, fever, likely death

You steal a fiver and run

And run

And run

The expectation of capture

Mary, Mary

You see a nurse and beg her for help

True kindness at last!

She becomes your friend

She keeps you safe

She looks after you

Your baby is born healthy

The expectation of family

Mary, Mary

You have no money, no prospects, no hope, no help

Your baby taken away for adoption

Promised a new and happy home

But you are distraught

And you lose your mind

And you become obsessed

And years later you steal a baby

From a pram

And you are jailed

Your eyes are getting heavy

You couldn't open them if you tried

You are getting sleepier

You no longer want to wake up

You want to wash away the pain in oblivion

You are going down, deeper

You have no happy memories

You have nothing to treasure

You have nothing

You are noone

You are the victim

You are alone

You are not alone

I give you my tears